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House of Horrors
Oct. 31st, 2017 04:20 amWell, it's been 50 years now since "the happiest night of my life."* For Halloween, 1967, me and my best friend, Richard Rudolph, staged a "House of Horrors" where we scared the daylights out of at least two dozen groups of trick-or-treaters. The previous Halloween, a mutual friend of ours had put on his own "Haunted House"-type thing which was a huge success, so we decided to do one of our own the next year.
First, we rigged up Rich's front door so it would appear to open all by itself. Then, a shrunken head would drop down and swing back and forth in the doorway, right in front of people's faces! That was good for some really great shrieks from the girls! Then we had this tape recorded message that boomed out, "Wel-come... to... the... House...... OF....... HORRORS!", followed by the sound of maniacal kid laughter played at half-speed. It was actually pretty scary sounding! Then, when the trick-or-treaters approached the candy bowl, another tape message said, "You have desecrated the spirit of the candy bar! NOW... YOU... MUST... DIE!!!!" At that point, most kids just ran away, forgetting all about the candy. Rich and I laughed at the end because the candy bowl was almost as full then as it had been when we started out.
My only disappointment about that night was that I had previously asked my dad if we could borrow one of his caskets to use as a prop. We wanted to put it in Rich's garage with one of us inside, and we'd raise the lid and sit up like we'd risen from the dead. But Dad said no. "It would be unethical," he said. I felt really gypped that he didn't want to go along with our plans, but as it turned out, we had more fun than we could handle with the other pranks we thought up.
I loved Halloween back then, but I haven't celebrated it at all as an adult. I know a lot of grownups like to dress up and party, but I think it really is meant to be a special time for kids. So tonight, the front gate will be locked and the porch light turned off. No trick-or-treating here. It's not that I'm mean or anything, I just don't think it's appropriate for a single man living by himself to interact with other people's children. If I had kids of my own, it might be different, but things being as they are, I think it's just better to sit the whole thing out. Or sleep through it. I do kind of feel like taking a nap right now...
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*At least it was my happiest up 'til that age. The happiest DAY of my life had been my last day of primary school, the year before. I was in the same school for all of K-6, and it seemed like it took forever to get out of that place. I didn't care that there were six more years to go before I got out of school altogether, I was just exhilarated that I was going on to junior high and I wasn't a 'little kid' in primary school anymore!
First, we rigged up Rich's front door so it would appear to open all by itself. Then, a shrunken head would drop down and swing back and forth in the doorway, right in front of people's faces! That was good for some really great shrieks from the girls! Then we had this tape recorded message that boomed out, "Wel-come... to... the... House...... OF....... HORRORS!", followed by the sound of maniacal kid laughter played at half-speed. It was actually pretty scary sounding! Then, when the trick-or-treaters approached the candy bowl, another tape message said, "You have desecrated the spirit of the candy bar! NOW... YOU... MUST... DIE!!!!" At that point, most kids just ran away, forgetting all about the candy. Rich and I laughed at the end because the candy bowl was almost as full then as it had been when we started out.
My only disappointment about that night was that I had previously asked my dad if we could borrow one of his caskets to use as a prop. We wanted to put it in Rich's garage with one of us inside, and we'd raise the lid and sit up like we'd risen from the dead. But Dad said no. "It would be unethical," he said. I felt really gypped that he didn't want to go along with our plans, but as it turned out, we had more fun than we could handle with the other pranks we thought up.
I loved Halloween back then, but I haven't celebrated it at all as an adult. I know a lot of grownups like to dress up and party, but I think it really is meant to be a special time for kids. So tonight, the front gate will be locked and the porch light turned off. No trick-or-treating here. It's not that I'm mean or anything, I just don't think it's appropriate for a single man living by himself to interact with other people's children. If I had kids of my own, it might be different, but things being as they are, I think it's just better to sit the whole thing out. Or sleep through it. I do kind of feel like taking a nap right now...
-----
*At least it was my happiest up 'til that age. The happiest DAY of my life had been my last day of primary school, the year before. I was in the same school for all of K-6, and it seemed like it took forever to get out of that place. I didn't care that there were six more years to go before I got out of school altogether, I was just exhilarated that I was going on to junior high and I wasn't a 'little kid' in primary school anymore!
